Funny, Google, Life

Offline Mode

Last year, I went on a Caribbean cruise with my wife and her family. I had a great time, but the downside to seven days aboard a floating resort in sparkling blue water is that the Internet access is prohibitively expensive: during that week, I was completely offline for the first time since my family first signed up with AOL in 1997, and this made me realize that I rely on search engines to answer the questions that life raises far more than I suspected. I’m sure that, to my wife, “Offline Chris” seems much less knowledgable than “Online Chris.”

Presented below without comment is a list of searches I would have performed if I could have; I don’t think it will be turned into one of those Google commercials any time soon, but it’s a pretty concise summary of our trip. See if you can infer anything about our trip; post your guesses in the comments.

  • define:Kirschwasser
  • How many people on Carnival Valor
  • define:vichyssoise
  • How many people have tattoos?
  • Capital of Belize
  • Denver channel 4 anchor
  • How to get cork out of bottle
  • Anteater bite
  • Tetracycline
  • Treat infection
  • Capuchin monkey
  • 10 knots in mi/hr
  • BWI cayman
  • Honduras ca
  • iTunes hey baby
  • Satellite Internet speeds
  • Office webisodes
  • Jack Welch
  • iTunes Brand New Day
  • Convert KW to HP
Standard

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